Monday, March 25, 2013

My Jesus Stories: Part 2

In approximately 2008, I had a profound dream.  In the dream, my Spirit Guide came to me.  He sat down next to me and said very seriously, "You are Jesus."  I shook my head and looked at him in disbelief and said, "No."  He repeated, "Yes, you are Jesus."  I put my head down into my hands covering my face and in my knowing that this was true, said to myself, "This (knowing) cannot be about ego."  And that was the end of the dream.

The next morning I was having a gathering of people at my house for spiritual discussion.  One of my friends surprised me by coming early.  When I opened the door, she handed me a gift.  It was a book called, "The Third Jesus."  Wow, it felt like confirmation of my dream.

I took me a little while to process that dream.  I mean, I knew I wasn't really Jesus and didn't think I was actually him in another lifetime, so what did it mean?  First, I realized that I was a healer, a teacher and a way-shower, so in that sense, it made sense - I was on the same path as Jesus, similar to him in ways.  Then, I realized that what my Spirit Guide probably meant was that I have Christ Consciousness.  The second coming of Christ on this planet is not the return of Jesus, the man.  It is the return of Christ Consciousness embodied in many people around the world who anchor and spread this vibration throughout the planet.  I know I embody this ( I AM this) and spread this vibration through me.

During my intense struggles in 2012, I used to say that I was being crucified.  I was a high-vibrational being, living in truth, being a healer, being love and yet I was being torn down by many people.  It felt like I was walking in similar footsteps as Jesus.  I had to speak my truth and hold forgiveness in my heart no matter what.  So, I suppose my dream was helping to prepare me for coming days, I just didn't know it at the time.

I am not totally sure why I had that dream or what it meant, but it was a profound (and very surprising!) experience.  It was a very personal experience that I don't share with many people...until now by writing it here.  I am doing this openly because perhaps more people have had experiences like this, but because of fear of seeming like one has a big ego or what other people may think, they hide their experiences.  My purpose in writing about these experiences is to open up that platform - to help others feel comfortable in sharing their own profound spiritual experiences.  Perhaps if someone reads this and also has had a profound spiritual experience that they have kept secret, they may feel liberated enough to tell someone about it knowing that there are others who have had similar experiences.  Once I started telling a select few people about my experiences, they started telling me that they had had similar "Jesus experiences".  So, go and tell your stories!  And, I will keep telling mine.

Saturday, March 23, 2013

My Jesus Stories: Part 1

I used to be agnostic and vocal about my not believing in Jesus.  I would tell people that all those stories about Jesus and everything that was written in the bible were just that: stories.  None of it was true, I would say.

In 2005 or 2006, I was talking to a medical intuitive on the phone.  This man is an amazing medical intuitive with incredible accuracy.  I knew this to be true as he would tell me about my medical situations with complete accuracy.  During this one phone call, he told me that Mother Mary was watching over me.  I was surprised.  I did not believe in her either.  BUT, because everything this man told me was true, I had to question my beliefs.  If Mother Mary was real, then Jesus was real, too.  So, this is how I started to consider that there really was a Jesus and Mary.  I was not completely convinced, but my mind was now open to the possibility.

My spiritual journey unfolded rapidly in those days with new awarenesses flowing in on a regular basis.

Fast forward to 2007.  During a dream, which was not really a dream, but a real spiritual experience I had one night, I was at my spiritual teacher's home.  I was lying on a massage table with my friends around me and we were doing spiritual healing work together.  Suddenly, my body arched up and mostly off the table because a huge Being of Light entered my body.  I was now out of my body while this Light Being was in my body, but I still had body consciousness, so I could feel the essence of who it was and still feel my body completely, even though I was also aware of my consciousness being outside of my body during that time.  Then after a little while, my body fell back down onto the table when this Light Being left my body and I re-entered my body completely.  I looked over at my spiritual teacher and said, "That was a Grand Master."  She knowingly nodded her head.  I said, "That was Jesus."  She nodded her head and smiled.  She knew.

A few weeks later, I was on the phone with this same spiritual teacher.  I asked her what that experience was about.  She told me that the Masters sometimes pulse their vibrations into our bodies so that we can attune ourselves to that vibration.  Wow.  I was very grateful to Jesus for coming (in)to me in that way.  For sure my doubts about him being real were completely gone.  I suppose first-hand experience is what I needed to believe.  And, I do believe.  In fact, I don't just believe in Jesus, I love him.

Kundalini Yoga and Me: Part 2

Kundalini Yoga kicks your butt.

It's not just that your muscles get tired and sore from doing it.  It stirs up emotions and uncovers what is held deep within your unconscious and subconscious mind in order for those buried emotions to be dealt with and released.

That explains why several people in my KY Teacher Training were crying during our weekend-long class and others said they cried after class.  I did not cry.  Instead, I felt euphoric, elated, high-vibing, and had waves of love pouring through me after each class.  I really felt incredible.

Until Monday.

Then, I was irritable, down and lonely.  This lasted for two weeks.  A friend pointed out to me that ever since I started my Kundalini Yoga Teacher Training, I had not been myself emotionally.  I had also realized this correlation, so I went online and did a quick search to see if there was a relationship between negative emotional release and Kundalini Yoga.  This is how I found out that yes, indeed, there is.  It stirs up your "stuff".

What is interesting is that in our last class, our instructor showed us a video of Yogi Bhajan, who brought KY to the US from India.  In the video he talks about how as children we are taught to use the potty - "to contain our shit".  We are taught from a very young age that "we must put our shit into a container and contain it".  He says this yoga helps us to release it.

Luckily, I have had years of experience working on my stuff.  I don't find that I have any major issues left to deal with (that I am aware of at least) - just life as it comes up in the present moment, which we all have to deal with until we leave this place.  So, I feel pretty clear in my mental and emotional bodies.  However, I still had this underlying irritability and discontent that came up after doing that weekend-long training, so it did bring up whatever residual stuff was in there.  It mostly had to do with my present-life situation - I felt like I wanted to look at every aspect of my current life and fix all of it right away.  Not a bad thing at all.

Another friend pointed out that I was being triggered in my core issue.  With that realization and knowing, I felt an empowerment surge through me in that instant and I knew that I could and would overcome it.  In that instant it was healed and it was effortless.  This feels like a miracle.  I attribute this rapid transformation to the practicing of Kundalini Yoga.      

That night, exactly two weeks after that first weekend training and those two weeks of feeling down, I had a pooping dream. (sorry to be so graphic!)  I filled the whole toilet in that dream.  The next morning, I woke up as a new person!  I was myself again and I felt great!  I didn't even have to "work through" my stuff.  Just one dream and I was done with it.  Amazing!  What I am finding so fascinating about this yoga is that it does seem to bring up what lies deep in the subconscious for clearing, but at least in my case, it seems that the clearing is automatic.  It just clears away without thought or processing.  I am astounded by the rapidity with which the shifts take place.

I feel lucky that I am doing this training after having worked through most of my stuff way before I started it so that I can enjoy the higher-vibrational benefits of it immediately.  It's not that I am perfect.  It's that having been on the spiritual and healing path for many years, I know the difference between who I was when I started on that path and who I am now.  I see the people around me going into emotional breakdowns and I understand what they are going through.  It is not a bad thing that Kundalini Yoga stirs up and clears out your crap - it's a good thing and a great way to do it.  It's also good for people to know that this can happen.  I read that people tend to run away from doing this yoga once this emotional clearing starts to happen, so I think it's good for people to know about this ahead of time.  I actually got a little worried myself and wondered if doing it was a bad thing, since I felt so bad after the weekend training.  However, learning about the tendency for emotional releasing from this practice has brought me relief.  Since then I have done more KY workshops and classes and I have benefited from the high vibrations that move through me as a result.  There is a softness within me and a deeper peace.

So, yes, this yoga kicks your butt in many ways, but in good ways.  And the journey continues....